LETTING GO WITH A CONFESSION - ADDICTED TO FEAR MONGERING AND DEATH THROUGH VARIOUS MEDIUMS

This was written on May 24th, 2012 and I have been in the light now for long enough to post it :)

Sometimes I go through some incredible waves of semi-depressive states in which I will commence to sink myself even deeper by indulging in media that furthers ingrains fear and negative thoughts.  Today I am taking a strong hold to eradicate those things from my life, but, as with many things, I had to enjoy one last final ride.  Just like the night before I quit drinking, I got completely obliterated, and when I have my crazy "I am quitting sugar" phases I will eat a whole box of sweets.  I guess it is just the way I deal with things and today I am accepting that and moving on from the spiral of negativity that was recently activated by two sources, the Showtime TV show "Dexter" and the novel "A Fine Balance" by Rohinton Mistry First let me talk about Dexter.

"Dexter" is the biggest mind F@*@ of a show that I have seen in a long time. A quick description goes like this; the show is about a man whom from childhood needed to express his dark passenger through killing, so his father taught him to kill people that he must kill people that are killing other people for no reason.  Dexter has a code of conduct and morality and is charming and intelligent.   The show is completely addictive, adventurous, entertaining, smart, surprising, sexy, seductive and extremely dangerous to the sub conscious.  It is not a show that you come out feeling good. It is a show that, well I can imagine, is making people think in the ways of a serial killer.  MMMMM, such a novel topic at this time in humanity.  I can share from my own experience that this show lingers into my mind quite often when I was watching it.  I also remember having dreams of killing and actually enjoying it.  But I had to keep going with it, honestly, it was just soo good, but I needed the drug of Dexter out of my life, so I marothoned through it as quickly as possible and have now completely gotten it out of my life with no chance of return.  I pray that the damage is short lived as I continue to reverse the effects by streaming inspiring and uplifting content in on a daily basis.  I wanted to actually let go of the program around season 2, but, like many out there in the world, I was just hooked.  Let that be the last!!

"A Fine Balance" by Rohinton Mistry focuses on every single negative aspect of the Indian culture that you could possibly gather into the extremely long 600 pages.   His writing method has the ability to hook you into a brighter day, having hope for the evil, compassion for the lonely and love for all, but all this only too slam you down into his "so-called" realities of everything ends bad.  I wonder sometimes if art like this is actually doing anything for the world.  Maybe it sparks someone to make a change, do something better or live a better life, but how many people does it spark the preconceived and long time conditioned notion that everything is the world is F@#$$% UP!  Well, like I have said, I put it down, left it behind along with that deep seated part of my life that is constantly yearning to sink into depression. 

I just had a conversation with a friends son whom told me that every girl he comes into contact with becomes depressed!  WOW, what is happening out there in the world.  Come on, lets wake up into the light.  I have been on the ACTIVE side of the spiritual path for more then 5 years now, an may I say active because I have always had the knowledge but never taken wholesome action, and I am still yearning after the darkness.  Is it so deeply engrained!  

I NOW COMMIT TO THE UNIVERSE, TO THE MULTI-VERSE, TO HUMANITY, TO YOU AND MOST IMPORTANTLY TO ME THAT I WILL SPEND THE REST OF MY DAYS STEERING INTO THE LIGHT.  I AM USING DISCIPLINE IN MY ACTIONS THAT WILL SOON ERADICATE THE URGES TO GO INTO THE DARKNESS.  I AM LIGHT AND I SHINE BRIGHT.

Notes about Wayne Dyer's Movie "The Shift"

Please, EVERYONE, take a few hours of your life for an extremely important film.

I have always loved Wayne Dyers work and appreciated the way wisdom moves through him but after viewing his 2009 Movie release "The Shift" I have reached a whole new level of respect and love.  

First of all I want to thank Hay House for sending me the DVD "FREE OF COST" to India.  It was a gesture above and beyond what I expected simply because my online stream of the movie was not working. 

I want to look at the exterior of the movie first and get that out of the way quickly.   The cinematography is WOW and the acting is great! compared to most movies of this caliber in which the acting could be compared to a b rated soft porn film.  I was blown away by it's tastefulness as a visual stunning and well acted film.

Now to the juicy stuff, the interior.  Dyer has an amazing way of delivering his message which has a profound way to instill peace of mind in your heart and soul.  I would say all and all, this movie is about FAITH and getting out of the way, as in recovery they say "Let Go and Let God."   Not in a way that is complacent or inactive, but a place that is full of inspiration and connection. The movie touches on various Religious Pathways by triggering our innate desire to stay in tune to that source that is guiding the ship of our lives.  The film is done in a way that serves to be relatable to people from all walks of life.  You have the rich asshole, the overworked housewife the stressed out up and comer, the wise servant janitor (surprise) and the calm awakened singer whom left his hustle and bustle to follow his heart.  The show goes on and we watch these people have their subtle "Shifts."  There is no over the top AH HA moments or major Unbelievable happenings of life changing circumstances, we just get to view various people interacting with Spiritual Leaders (outspoken and subtle) and with each other and how that effects their life, all while enjoying the stream of wisdom that naturally pours through Wayne Dyer.  I could go further into the reflections of consciousness that this film moves through but my intention with this writing is to ask everyone to give it attention and highly fascinating spiritual blabber could possibly negate that intention.  

I have to say this movie EXCITES me beyond belief.  To see something that is so accessible to all walks of life.  It moved me!  I truly have felt a SHIFT in my consciousness just from watching it, and I have been on the move with this type of work for a long time.  I cannot even begin to imagine what it will do for those on the brink of their own AWAKENING!  

Shine on DYER and everyone involved in this production!  1000s of thumbs up and may this reach the hearts of the masses. 

Just Felt Like Writing Something

Through the business of these days, the constant day to day meandering through this material existence, playing the game of life in a fluid and highly charged manner, I can only share words of complete gratitude! I know I spend a lot of time in positive portrayal of life and I know that there are possibly many people out there that would just like to slap the shit out of me and say, STOP BEING SO F***KING POSITIVE. OK, but why. Yeah my mind goes through the turmoil of existence on a daily basis, pondering insane thoughts of unrest and doubt, but, why I SAY, why speak on them. Words are as powerful as worlds and are the creators of our reality, so, I speak what I wish to see in my life, I share when my heart is open and I like to speak out from that place. There isn't space for self-loathing anymore, although it will always be somewhere tucked in our consciousness, but, again, I ask why, why speak on it. Because it help you to say hmmmmmm, possibly, but I will spit some lyrics at you from the song "HIGH" - Now watch what you say because the plants they play in the words echoing in the breeze - with a healthy mind and a healthy speech WE CAN POWER THE WORLD TO PEACE!! -

I look around a lot lately at this little game of life that 7 billion of us are playing on this planet, and, honestly, I cannot help but laugh when I come upon the realization that I play the game as a being whom acts as a guide to bring others to see this all as a game, and the game that I play has endless work for hundreds of years!! Oh, what a fun choice I have made....Such gratitude to walk hand and hand with the people that are making a difference in a time and space that really does not exist and even if it does, is such a small part of the infinite universe that is inside of each and every one of us. We are so powerful, yet we use our minds to disempower ourselves daily, WHY!!

Imagine a life where you are aware of the inevitable end, the "so-called" death, and each and every day you live in a reflection of the LIFE that is here now, and are completely expressive in each and every moment of it.

Imagine a life in which you whole-heartedly go after the things that are of your greatest imagination.
Imagine a life in which fear takes a back seat to love.
Imagine a life in which you manifest each and every little thing that you have ever wanted in your existence.
Imagine a life in which you are healthy and vibrant and feel like you are getting younger as the years pile on.
Imagine a life in which you are one with god, not God's servant or separate.
Imagine a life in which you are disciplined enough to love and respect YOURSELF and your integrity!
Imagine a life in which you wake up every day in complete gratitude and awe of EVERYTHING!
Start THIS MOMENT and make this your reality! It is a choice, believe me.

Lately I have been using various techniques that aid in my taking a conscious decision to completely alter the conditioning that has kept me down for so many years. After 30 years of waking up wanting to punch a small child, I now can wake with a sense of peace and calm, thinking thoughts of endless possibilities and gratitude for the many blessings I have in that moment. I see the people around me blossoming and creating their bliss daily!! oh boy, what a blessing it all is.......at this point, there is only one more thing I have to say, I AM IN LOVE WITH ME and MY LIFE and that makes my relationship with each and every entity on earth radiate from that space!! So, when I say I LOVE YOU, I can only say it because....I LOVE ME SO MUCH.

Our imagination is our reality when acted upon.....

Always One To Remember

A young man, a student in one of the universities, was one day taking a walk with a professor, who was commonly called the students' friend for his kindness to those who waited on his instructions.

As they went along, they saw lying in the path a pair of old shoes, which were supposed to belong to a poor man who was working in a field close by, and who had nearly finished his day's work . . .

Student turned to the professor, saying: "Let us play the man a trick:

We will hide his shoes, and hide ourselves behind those bushes, and wait to see his perplexity when he cannot find them ..."

"My young friend," answered the professor, "We should never amuse ourselves at the expense of the poor . . . But you are rich, and may give yourself a much greater pleasure by means of this poor man.

Put a coin in each shoe, and then we will hide ourselves and watch how this affects him." Visit: The student did so and they both placed themselves behind the bushes close by. The poor man soon finished his work, and came across the field to the path where he had left his coat and shoes . . .


While putting on his coat he slipped his foot into one of his shoes, but feeling something hard, he stooped down to feel what it was, and found the coin. Astonishment and wonder were seen upon his countenance.


He gazed upon the coin, turned it around and looked at it again and again.


He then looked around him on all sides, but no person was to be seen. He now put the money into his pocket, and proceeded to put on the other shoe; but his surprise was doubled on finding the other coin . . .


His feelings overcame him . . . He fell upon his knees, looked up to heaven and uttered aloud a fervent thanksgiving in which he spoke of his wife, sick and helpless, and his children without bread, whom this timely bounty, from some unknown hand, would save from perishing . . .


The student stood there deeply affected, and his eyes filled with tears.

"Now," said the professor, are you not much better pleased than if you had played your intended trick?"

The youth replied, "You have taught me a lesson which I will never forget. .. I feel now the truth of these words, which I never understood before: "It's more blessed to give than to receive."

Something that I wrote about love on the Chameleon Tour - 2005

I was going over the Full Moon Rising Chameleon Tour Experience the other day and found these gems of wisdom....thought to share!!

LOVE IS ETERNAL, LOVE IS INFINITE, IT HAS NO BOUNDRIES, IT HAS NO LABELS AND IS A FEELING OF LIGHTNESS AND UNDERSTANDING BETWEEN PEOPLE/THINGS, NOT HEAVINESS, NEED OR ANY OTHER NEGATIVE EMOTION. I NEVER WOULD HAVE IMAGINED A LIFE OF LOVE LIKE THIS..

I LOVE A LOT OF PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD, BUT ONLY IN THE TRUE ESSENCE OF LOVING MYSELF HAVE I FOUND THAT THE WORD LOVE MEANS:


FREEDOM


SO WHEN YOU THINK YOU ARE “FALLING IN LOVE” REDIRECT THAT THOUGHT TO: I AM INFINITELY UNSCATHED BY FEAR AND NEGATIVITY AND OPEN TO EXPERIENCE THE LIGHT OF HUMAN CONNECTIVITY, FOR THOSE WORDS CAN MAKE ANYONE FEEL LIKE THEY ARE FALLING.


A BROKEN HEART IS A BROKEN PERSON IN NEED OF SELF REALIZATION THAT WAS NOT IN LOVE, BUT WAS EVERYTHING ELSE BUT “IN LOVE”


TRUST ME, IT IS EASIER TO FEAR, IT IS WHAT WE DO, BUT GO LOOK UP THE WORD LOVE, FOR IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH FEAR.









and what I wrote few weeks later:

JEOLOUSY, ENVY, SELF-DEPRIVATION, LOSS OF SELF, PUTTING WEIGHT ON MONEY AND FAVORS, JUDGING, HEAVINESS, ANGER, DISRESPECT…



FEAR


Please do not let that word enter into any relationship in your life, ever, it will only cause you and those around you harm that there is no need to have…I think this upcoming lesson is the biggest one of the whole tour…I am actually writing this on the other end of the lesson, almost 2 weeks later…this is a good one…but please just remember the most important word in life and do not forget it…

.
LOVE�

The Green Sacred Mandala of Empowerment

While connecting with fellow healers in the deserts of Mitzpe Ramon, Israel, something profound come into my being as a message!! While lightly gazing at the turning sky, watching the decent of many stars and the rise of others, My eyes became fixed on an image that appeared in the night sky. The image was familiar, being that I have spent lots of time engaged in sacred geometry and crop circle sightings. It was a Mandala, one in which I did not recognize, but for certain a sacred circle. While my eyes opened to the phenomenon, an energy burst into my heart unlike anything I have ever experienced in my life. The energy busted open my heart, echoed throughout my body and shook the whole entire earth with a power and strength that was so massive, I could not help but loose a breath and follow it up with a deep massive breath of empowerment. This energy, was an energy I have never felt in my life. Strong, pure, unwavering waves of Strength, beyond anything that can be manifested in the material world. At that point, it was clear and will be clear for me for the rest of this lifetime, Humanity is waking up and that awakening is bringing such strength and empowerment, that the fears and doubts about our existence are all following away into a subtle "I don't know, but I will live Holistically!!!" It was a power In which I can imagine human beings from all walks of life standing on the top of their roofs, open hearted with a huge smile on the face shouting brave, "I CAN DO ANYTHING I WANT IN THIS LIFE, LIVE ANY WAY THAT I WANT, ACHIEVE ANYTHING THAT I WANT, CREATE ANYTHING THAT I WANT, AND I WILL DO IT FEARLESSLY WITH MY HEART OPEN AND FULL OF LOVE!!! WE ARE THE ONES WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR and THE TIME IS NOW!!!!!

We are much more powerful then we are taught to believe.....in this message I received I am clear that each and every one of us can live to our highest potential!!

THE TIME IS NOW!!!